CAUSE OF DEATH
LMAO Defies Gravity, Liquidity Pool Survives
In a remarkable twist of evolutionary fate, LMAO! has managed to cheat the reaper—at least for now. With its authorities properly neutered and a respectable 18.3% daily surge, this token demonstrates the peculiar resilience of those blessed with modest liquidity and distributed holdings, though one mustn't mistake survival for thriving.
CAUSE OF DEATH
Not deceased; merely perpetually endangered
EPITAPH
"It didn't die laughing—it's still trying to figure out the joke."