CAUSE OF DEATH
Penguin Plummets: Birth to Burial in Hours
Here we observe a remarkable specimen of the pump-and-dump variety, born mere moments ago with all the promise of a newly hatched chick—only to discover it was never meant to fly. Notice how, despite revoking both mint and freeze authorities in a performative gesture toward legitimacy, our nine holders collectively own every last token, a mathematical certainty that would make even nature's most brutal predators blush. The creature expired before it could properly waddle.
CAUSE OF DEATH
Concentrated ownership, zero liquidity, instant rug
EPITAPH
"In death, it achieved what it never could in life: perfect equality among its nine holders, who each inherited precisely nothing."
