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Cebu: A One-Hour Financial Extinction Event

In the unforgiving savanna of decentralized finance, we observe the Cebu token in its final, gasping moments—a creature that never truly drew breath. Born merely an hour ago with all the structural integrity of a house of cards in a hurricane, this remarkable specimen managed to hemorrhage eighteen percent of its non-existent value while ninety-nine point nine percent of its holders conspired in what can only be described as mathematical inevitability.