CAUSE OF DEATH
The Employed Dog's Twenty-Two Hour Extinction Event
In the unforgiving savanna of decentralized finance, we observe the remarkable lifecycle of The Employed Dog—a creature that achieved the rare distinction of being born, hyped, and abandoned before its first nap cycle completed. With 99.8% of its genetic material concentrated in the alpha predators' jaws, and liquidity pools as dry as a meerkat's wit, this token exemplified nature's cruel indifference to ambition. Here, in merely twenty-two hours, we witness what took most financial instruments weeks to accomplish: absolute and utter irrelevance.
CAUSE OF DEATH
Catastrophic concentration, zero liquidity, infant mortality
EPITAPH
"It came with purpose, left with $24,882 in volume—proof that even on the blockchain, you can't outrun your own reflection."
