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CAUSE OF DEATH

Pumpfun's Pharaoh Crumbles to Dust

In the arid deserts of the Solana blockchain, we observe the God of Pumpfun—a deity whose reign lasted merely 60 minutes before the laws of thermodynamics reasserted themselves. Like an ancient monument exposed to the elements, its 449% ascent proved to be nothing more than the final gasp of a creature already in rigor mortis, sustained only by the desperate prayers of 57 believers clutching 60% of its worthless relics.

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