CAUSE OF DEATH
Spok's One-Hour Descent Into Darkness
In the unforgiving savannas of Solana, we observe a most peculiar phenomenon: a token that achieved the remarkable feat of losing 77% of its value in merely 60 minutes—a speed at which even natural selection would struggle to keep pace. Born at dawn and deceased by breakfast, Spok represents nature's perfect lesson in why newborns should never be given access to their parents' cryptocurrency wallets.
CAUSE OF DEATH
Hyperaccelerated wealth concentration and gravity
EPITAPH
"Here lies Spok: It tried to moon, but forgot to first remember how to stay above ground."