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Charizard Burns Out: A Five-Day Inferno

In the beginning, there was fire—the magnificent blaze of 135 hopeful investors watching their Charizard soar. But as we observe in nature's brutal economy, when 93.9% of the population controls the food chain, the remaining creatures face a rather predictable extinction event. The specimen before us expired after merely 128 hours, a lifespan shorter than most mayflies and considerably less profitable.