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MESSI's Beautiful Game Ends in Spectacular Collapse

Here we observe the carcass of MESSI, a token that promised the elegance of its namesake but delivered only the defensive prowess of a goalkeeper with vertigo. With ninety-three percent of its value evaporating in a single day and liquidity pools as dry as a Saharan penalty kick, the creature's final throes were mercifully brief. Forty-two holders remain, mostly clutching worthless tokens like bewildered fans after a devastating loss.