FED RATE HAWK ALARM7vmoGJvowKytrzHQvyfxihnLKrjSReKEWR2FQh9cpump

Newborn Token Dies of Acute Concentration

Here we observe a peculiar specimen: born mere hours ago, it experienced a violent 123% seizure before succumbing to the crushing weight of its own inequality. Like a mayfly that somehow obtained venture capital, it burned brilliantly and briefly, unaware that 76% of its body mass resided in merely ten cells. The revoked authorities suggest someone, at least, had the decency to mercy-kill it before natural selection could do worse.