CAUSE OF DEATH
Penguin Waddled Into Extinction in Sixty Minutes
Here we observe the Ragebait Penguin in its natural habitat—the graveyard of forgotten memecoins. Born merely an hour ago with all the promise of a newborn chick, it has already plummeted 37% into the abyss, a cautionary tale of how quickly hubris turns to icicles. Despite revoked authorities and a respectable $208k in volume, our feathered friend could not escape the immutable laws of gravity and retail panic.
CAUSE OF DEATH
Extreme velocity decline meets concentrated whale holdings
EPITAPH
"It lived by the rage, it died by the paper hands. RIP to a penguin that never learned to fly."
