CAUSE OF DEATH
Newborn Token Gasps Final Breath in One Hour
Here we observe a remarkable specimen of the genus Pump-and-Dump-icus, born merely sixty minutes ago with all the promise of a SpaceX rocket—only to plummet faster than a Challenger disaster. The creature's brief existence has been marked by a catastrophic 22% hemorrhage, as its top holders, clutching 50% of the supply, have begun their evolutionary escape from this burning wreckage. One can only admire the audacity of launching into the void with such casual indifference to physics, regulation, or basic arithmetic.
CAUSE OF DEATH
Catastrophic launch failure, institutional bag dumping
EPITAPH
"It flew too close to the sun on wings of liquidity, only to discover that $12,961 buys you a one-way ticket to irrelevance."
