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CAUSE OF DEATH

Christmas Dog's Nuts Cracked Before Dawn

In the predawn hours of its existence, the Christmas Dog met a fate as swift as it was inevitable. Here we observe a specimen that achieved the remarkable feat of dying before it was truly born—a financial stillbirth masquerading as a blockchain transaction. The 89% price collapse in mere hours suggests that even in death, this token could not resist one final, convulsive spasm of volatility.

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