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Mittens Proved No Match For Market Entropy

Here we observe the Kittens with Mittens, a specimen that arrived fully formed into the ecosystem merely ten days ago, already displaying the telltale symptoms of terminal concentration. With fifty-four percent of its genetic material held by the alpha predators and a liquidity pool barely sufficient to purchase a mid-range laptop, the creature stumbled forward on trembling legs, each transaction a Sisyphean effort against the crushing weight of inevitability.