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CAUSE OF DEATH

Newborn Token Arrives Dead on Arrival

In the vast savanna of decentralized finance, we observe a most peculiar specimen: a token so freshly minted it hadn't yet dried from the blockchain's amniotic fluid before hemorrhaging 81.7% of its value. One must admire the audacity of concentration—where 67.5% of holders control the ecosystem like a python with particularly poor meal planning. The creature thrashed about with $62,947 in daily volume before nature's cruel mathematics rendered it extinct.

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